1. Killer bees.
Last night I'm walking through the park with my girl and my dog, and my dog gets stung on the nose by a bee. And while I'm standing there feeling sorry for her, I get stung on the back of the leg. The first sting I ever got (and the only other one in my life) was when I was seven and it didn't hurt all that much. This one, however, was very painful. And what's worse, it was completely unprovoked. So as a warning to all, I'm alerting you to the presence of a swarm of hyper-agressive killer bees in Palmer Park. Watch yourself, and be ready to run. Sasha picked up a second sting on her right rear leg. She was limping the rest of the night. It was very sad.
As if my sore, stung leg wasn't enough, I got a migraine. I can remember watching Terrell Davis carry the Broncos to a Super Bowl victory over the Packers in 1998 while suffering from a migraine, and sitting in my parents' family room I thought to myself, "Ok, dude's got a headache. Big deal." Then I got a migraine in February 2004, but I didn't know it was one when it was happening. It started as a big blind spot, which freaked me out because if I go blind there goes my career. Then I started forgetting things and not being able to understand words, which freaked me out because if I go stupid there goes my personality. Then I got a really really bad headache and had to go to bed, which freaked me out because if I can't watch CSI there goes my Thursday night. I had another one about six months ago, it was so bad I had to go home from work and couldn't be upright or open my eyes for a good three to four hours. This one last night was pretty bad, but I made it through. FYI, watching two episodes of "House" about incurable, unknown diseases while you're fighting off a migraine really doesn't do much for your self-image.
3. Sports radio.
This morning I turned on the radio and to my surprise Sports 1240 had changed formats to a bland, news-oriented talk show station. I'm furious now. Why the heck? There's already more of those than I can count. Heaven forbid we should have a national sports radio station in town. Angry angry angry.
So, in order to cheer both myself and yourself up on this gloomy day, let's watch some Japanese (at least I think so) contraptions.