8.08.2006

Things I'm down on.


1. Hand Sanitizer
How did we ever get along before this? You know why we're so afraid of germs today? Because of antibacterial stuff like this. I don't use hand sanitizer. It only makes the germs stronger. Eventually our hands are going to fall off. Stop it everyone.

2. Jeff Crank
He's at it again. Another campaign commercial, this one about the deficit. First off, no president of any party should have the line item veto. Second, and the thing that really flips my lid, is this quote at the end of the commercial: "Don't our children deserve better? Jeff Crank thinks so." Again, there's no hope for his opponents, who apparently hate children. Jeff Crank, anti-terrorism, pro-children. That's quite a stance to be making.

3. The Youth of America
Last night's Jeopardy was another episode of the college tournament. A category was, I kid you not, entitled "MC Trebek in the Hizzouse". Apparently the writers at Jeopardy are hip to the Ken Jennings satire vibe. Anyway, the point of the category was to name the artist from the lyric. There was Eminem, Nelly, Snoop Dogg. But the last two questions made me a little depressed. A paraphrased transcript:

Contestant: I'll take 'MC Trebek in the Hizzouse' for 1600.

Trebek: "Your mother busts in and says, 'What's that noise?' Momma's just jealous, it's..."

...

[buzzer sound]

Trebek: We were looking for The Beastie Boys.

Contestant: 'MC Trebek' for 2000.

Trebek: "Momma said knock you out..."

...

[buzzer sound]

Trebek: An old hit for LL Cool J.


The youth of America suck. Put up any lyric from any crappy song from the last five years and they'd all be clamoring to answer. But when did "Fight For Your Right to Party" stop being a timeless teenage classic? Who the heck doesn't know that one?!

I'm too angry. I gotta go.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

man, i didn't even listen to music until 1991 when PM Dawn turned me on to how great pop music could be, and *I* even know those lyrics. crap.