1. AI needs to send a huge gift basket to Isaiah Thomas. Thomas, the Knicks coach, instigates a brawl on Saturday night. The Nuggets' top scorer, the NBA's top scorer, Carmelo Anthony, sucker punches a guy and gets a 15-game suspension. (If you haven't seen the footage yet, watch how much of a little beeoch Anthony is.) So without its leading scorer, Denver is forced to pull the trigger on a trade for Iverson. Now he's on a legitimate contender instead of the worst team in the NBA. Like I said, somebody deserves a really big thank you.
2. Picture this: Your spouse gets a call in the morning saying she doesn't have to go to work due to near-blizzard conditions. You, however, have to go to work. So you pile into your car before dawn and start the slow, agonizing trek over windswept streets toward the office. What do you listen to? I submit to you that Interpol is the best music for this opportunity. I know this is Christmas music season, but I'm pushing Interpol today. Hard.
3. It's about fricken time the Vikings put in Tarvaris Jackson. You're gonna see some fireworks Thursday night, I'm telling you. It's poetic that he's making his first start at Lambeau Field. And I'm refusing to call him T-Jack. I'm sick of these Initial-First Syllable names. Let's start getting a little creativity back in nicknames, people. For instance, I will be referring to Tarvaris Jackson as "Grabthar's Hammer" from now on. Nod in agreement if you get the reference.
4. Gregg Easterbrook joins my starting lineup of sports columnists. His column, Tuesday Morning Quarterback, is always spot on, even if it deviates into unknown realms.
5. Oh man, too funny.