My hero.

The first story.

The second story.

The commentary:

1. I loved this guy when he was on Jeopardy, because you could tell that not only was he infinitely more well-versed in trivia, but he was one of those guys that used to hate the jocks and popular kids in high school. Cynical, geeky, and very funny.

2. Jokes about Alex Trebek's moustache: always funny. In fact, I'd call what he said the funniest jokes about Alex Trebek ever. What does that say about Trebek when the funniest jokes ever about him come from a Mormon know-it-all?

3. I can't believe this actually made news. That's the New York Post for you.

4. Those categories for middle America are hilarious. I would pee myself if they actually showed up on Jeopardy, especially "Skanks from Reality TV Who Got Naked in Men's Magazines".

5. This guy has a website?! Hot crackers!

Oh, and a follow-up on yesterday. I didn't do anything last night. I went and saw "The Break-Up" at the cheap seats. I want my fifty cents back.

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